Sunday, August 12, 2012

The scream in the night

Sometimes I can remember them, parts of the scenes that flashed in my head during the night. Some are childhood scenes, some are of people I never met. The subconsciousness can hold a flick of a moment in passing, a memory forgotten, or a loved one passed. There are the scary scenes and the bitter sweet ones.  Sometimes they are in black and white and sometimes in color.
The mind can play tricks on you as if its not controlled by your own thought process. I don't remember too many of my dreams and they come even less as I get older. Occasionally I have a short dream that makes no since but I wake up remembering that my mother was in that dream and then in that next second I cant remember what the dream was even about . I have dreamed scenes of my body being able to fly and felt the peace as I looked down at the world below as I soared through the clouds. I have had very weird dreams where I would be in school, walking to my locker, wearing nothing and no one noticing. And whats with those dreams that are like watching a TV show and it has no meaning, just boring scenes and ya just want to change the channel.
Then there are the ones I can remember. That dream that starts out good and then your paralyzed, screaming, hurting, crying. Some how in that terrifying moment your mind does take control and you manage to get that sound to come to surface and you yell out in the dark night awaking me. As I lay there in the darkness, heart beating fast, replaying the scene in my mind, I feel helpless as a child. I reach out my hand and touch my husband to make sure hes there and to assure myself that I am awake. I tell myself it was just a dream...But why do the tears flow? Why did the dream seem so real?  Why are those the dreams that I remember?

When my children were small, my mother would tell them this little poem....
Good Night
sleep tight
Don't let the bedbugs bite.
And if they do
get a shoe
and beat them till their black and blue.


6 comments:

  1. I have been pondering my dreams lately. I dream often of my mom. The current dream is she is in the hospital dying and I am incredulous. "She already died!" , I tell everyone. But nobody listens and I have to go to my mom's side to watch her die all over again.
    Those dreams are the ones I could forget. Watching her die once was enough.

    ReplyDelete
  2. oh those dreams. My husband used to have terrible ones. I go through periods when I remember them all and dream vividly then it seems like nothing. I never try to over analyze them, I figure the main theme or feeling is the focus, fear? uncertainty? unpreparedness?
    I do hate the ones where I feel I am trying to wake up and I can't, I swear I have awoken and yet I can't move, I can see every detail around me but I cannot move.....until I actually wake up. Weird, I read once that is called sleep paralization, I am intrigued by that.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I very rarely dream and I think that is a good thing!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. i dreamed 3 time my hubby died . i woke u crying hard .
    when i was going to have my baby i had a dream i had her and she turned into a cat . another time i dreamed she was under the couch .
    db

    ReplyDelete
  5. my daughter informed me the smarter you are the more you dream....I rarely have dreams.
    my recurring dream is that I got for my 6 month post partum check and the OB informs me I am still pregnant.
    I am your newest follower..pls follow back if you can.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I have had so many dreams that scared me, but it's the funny ones that I remember most. Once I dreamed that the cartoon crows "Heckle & Jeckle" were swimming in a very large pool of hot oil while I watched from above. They were doing back strokes & having a great time, and motioning for me to jump in and join them that the oil is fine. My husband still laughs about that dream. I should have never told him about it...lol

    ReplyDelete