Wow, what a difference the last five months have had on me. I took control of my life. Not only did I set and reach a weight goal without dieting, but with the support of NM and all the new cyber friends I have in the journal room. NM has made me learn to control what and how I eat.” I am eating to live, no longer living to eat.” Don’t take me wrong…I have moments where I eat something that may not be as healthy for me, maybe even a splurge, but I am in control of this body and what fuels it. So I log it in my food log, and move on. I was so hard headed when it came to eating a greener life! It has taken months, but I’m getting there. I have lot more green days than red now; I’m eating way more calories than I could ever imagine I could and still lose weight from it. I went from 148 pounds to my 119 weight now. I am only five feet tall so you can see that would make me over weight and say…plump! When you can’t stand looking at your own body, you sure as heck don’t want someone else to see it! And those poor people who watch the cameras on the dressing rooms above your head as you try to find something, anything that will fit! That must be a scary sight! I hated that! So….I took control of my life.
That’s why I was talking about walking! My life didn’t only need to change in size, it needed structure or restructuring. The bones in my body, according to my doctor are paper thin with osteoporosis. It runs in my family. My grandmother had it; she shrunk to 4 feet before she died. My mother’s Twin has it, and breaks a bone just by walking across a room. My mom may have had it because she was getting shorter when she was living. One of her other sisters is in a nursing home, in a bed, has it bad. My sister has it, has already broken bones. Now I have it! I’m afraid for my own daughters, who will properly get it also. I have broken my tail bone twice in twenty years. Once when I was in my late twenties and then again two years ago, that’s when I was told I had osteoporosis. I have chosen not to take prescription medication for it. I think I am doing better by taking vitamins, eating healthier, and walking….walking….walking.
I can’t explain in words how walking makes me feel. I have tried in other posts, I love to walk, my mother loved to walk. I hear her voice on every walk I go on. She encourages me, pushes me, and walks in my shadow beside me. I will walk with her on paths of gold one day, never being out of breath, hurting from the pains in my joints, or being so cold while you walk that your fingers and toes feel like they would freeze and break off. I walk because I want to, remember, I’m in control, not those thin bones.
Walking has taught me courage! That while always being aware of what and who’s around me, I don’t have to be afraid to walk alone. God is always watching for me!
Walking has taught me respect! That there are people out there that could care less if you’re facing the traffic so to keep out of there way when they pass, but insist to take not only the road, but the whole road and cause you to walk in the ditch or be hit. For this reason when I see someone walking or running on the road, I give them all the respect I can and move over.
Walking has taught me to obey the laws! There are people who stand and watch their own dog run at you with teeth showing and in attack mood, while they watch and never call them off , knowing we have leash laws even in the country and they could care less if their dog bites someone. I obey the law and keep my horses and cows in fences and carry insurance so if they got out and hurt someone by hitting their car or whatever else, I would be responsible.
Walking has taught me peace! The quietness of the morning so I can hear the birds sing , the beauty in watching the geese fly over head, The color changes in the trees, the glimpse of a running deer or the playfulness of a squirrel. The peace I get in my heart, body, and soul.
Walking has taught me to achieve goals! I set a goal to start out walking two miles, now walk four. I set a goal to walk two times a week. Now walk five, sometimes more. I still have another goal…to be able to train and start running in the spring. I am in control, remember? I love being in control!